Star Power
I want to set the record straight on this. There are rumors that we’re scrambling to re-sign Punk because of a recognized chasm in star power on the show. These rumors are horse shit. We don’t worry about stars.
Yeah, in the last two years, a lot of sports entertainers have left to become…other things, I guess. What is Batista doing now? Anyone heard from Jericho? Anyways, why they left isn’t important. The point is, we don’t miss them. We don’t miss anyone. That’s not how the E rolls, marktards. Everyone is replaceable.
The people reporting that we’re worried about perceived star power are the same people who thought we were done in 93 when Hogan left, or in 96 when Nash and Hall left, or in 2003 when Austin and Rock left, or in 09 when Orton left (the part of Randy Orton is currently being played by Sheryl Crow). These people can’t imagine how we survive these things, because they still don’t understand how this business works.
We have a perfect routine. We indoctrinate on television, and we evangelize during live events. People of all ages are compelled to watch our shows because we provide a consistent live action soap opera, and when they show up and buy a ticket, it’s over; We’ve got them for life. No matter how much they grow out of it. No matter how many years they might go without a fix. No matter how many websites they start up to decry us. They’re ours, forever. They always come around. They always come back. We’ve been in this game long enough to know the truth.
Punk explained as much in the speech I wrote for him. He’s a cog in the system. He’s going to leave, and we’re going to keep on rolling. I’m going to make money despite myself. Check the adjective, as Nash would say (even though it’s a verb): I’m going to make money.
As for stars, don’t worry. Despite what you think, we’re very, very good at creating them. I think you’ll be shocked as to what we do with our current crop of mid carders this year. Remember 1998, when Rock and HHH were fighting over the intercontinental title, elevating both of them into the main event? You’re going to see something very similar happen with a few of those Smackdown fellows. And as for the stars we have now, I think you forget about their longevity. Every year, we get a class of fans who haven’t heard of John Cena. Every year, a new set of customers show up bewildered by Randy Orton. And when Cena and Orton decide to go be actors or porn stars or whatever is considered more respectable than sports entertaining, we’ll replace them. How quickly you all forget that they were replacements for Rock and Austin, who replaced Michaels and Hart, who replaced Hogan and Savage, and so on.
Trust us. We’re fine. Just keep showing up. We’ll give you something you’ll never forget, so long as you don’t remember that we’ve already sold it to you ten times over.
